He’s named after the way he feels about the very cereal he promotes. Courtesy of Kellogg’sĭig’em is about as chill as it gets. What’s the deal, Cap? Why does your cereal gotta be so dangerous? Surely there must be a way to retain the flavor without feeling like you’re eating a bowl of ninja throwing stars. With every bite, you’re declaring war on the roof of your mouth. Not Much Different than Eating Razor Blades: Cap’n CrunchĬap’n Crunch is straight up painful. Peanut butter and chocolate is a time-tested combo, and just like Reese’s candy, the cereal is nothing short of a grand slam. Not sure how they got away with simply combining Cocoa Puffs and Peanut Butter Crunch, but they’ve done it - and they’ve done it well. Reese’s Puffs, by all means, is cheating. That’s what a bite of Cinnamon Toast Crunch is like. The taste takes you up to the heavens, to the great beyond, towards light, to the edge of time and space, and into dimensions untold. Every aspect of General Mills’ masterpiece combines to create a harmonious union of flavor, elevating you from the blandness of your normal life to a place far away from worries, strife, and away from trouble. Memories are triggered from a simpler time - after little league, or after school, or after 15 blunts. Courtesy of General Millsīest Cereal in the History of Cereals: Cinnamon Toast CrunchĪs you chomp down a spoonful of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, a river of sensations flow, dreamlike, across your palate: The delicate, yet precise balance of cinnamon and sugar the flawless crunch of the toasted wheat and rice the cold sensation of milk blended with a dash of nostalgia. We think it’s high time we look around at the world of cereal and see just what’s going on. It’s a perfect food, no matter the time of day. Is there anything more definitive of the munchies than a big bowl of cereal? We honestly don’t think so.
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